The Museum of Dashes

Gift Shop

& Acquisitions Desk

A curated selection of typographic ephemera, commemorative goods, and educational materials. All proceeds support the ongoing preservation and classification of endangered horizontal marks.

Notice to Visitors

Due to unprecedented demand and a series of inventory-related incidents, all items are currently unavailable for purchase. The management apologizes for any inconvenience and reminds visitors that wanting is itself a form of having.

Apparel

Sold Out

The Canonical Tee

Vestis typographica

A cotton garment featuring all three canonical dashes arranged in descending order of width. The hyphen sits at chest level, suggesting humility. The em dash spans the lower back, suggesting drama.

$38.00Item #tee-001

Note: Last purchased by a copy editor in 2019

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Tote of Burden

Sacculus laboris

A canvas vessel for transporting your typographic anxieties. Features a single, exhausted en dash that has been carrying compound modifiers since 1984.

$24.00Item #tote-001

Note: Supply chain disrupted by rogue soft hyphens

Stationery

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Postcards from the Void

Epistula vacua

A set of 12 postcards, each bearing a different zero-width character. The reverse side reads: "Wish you were here, but technically you already are nowhere."

$12.00Item #post-001

Note: Inventory status: uncertain (may have dematerialized)

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The Ruled Notebook

Codex lineatus

120 pages of horizontal lines, each one a distant cousin of the dash. The lines do not connect to anything. They simply are. A meditation on parallelism.

$18.00Item #note-001

Note: All lines have migrated to page 47

Decorative

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Em Dash Specimen Print

Pictura interruptio

Archival giclée print of Specimen #c-3 (the em dash) at 400% magnification. Frame not included—the em dash refuses to be contained.

$45.00Item #print-001

Note: The specimen escaped during printing

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Vertical Dash Mobile

Mobilis verticalem

A kinetic sculpture featuring rotated dashes suspended at various heights. Some visitors report the dashes slowly returning to horizontal when unobserved.

$85.00Item #mobile-001

Note: Current position: unknown

Educational

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Dash Identification Flash Cards

Chartulae discriminis

52 cards for distinguishing between visually identical horizontal marks. Includes 8 blank cards representing characters you cannot perceive.

$15.00Item #flash-001

Note: Cards have shuffled themselves into entropy

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Morse Code Meditations (Vinyl)

Sonitus contemplativus

Side A: 22 minutes of continuous dashes (—). Side B: Silence representing the spaces between. Pressed on 180g vinyl the exact width of an em dash at 72pt.

$32.00Item #audio-001

Note: Audio quality degraded by ambient anxiety

Curiosities

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Jar of Authentic Hyphens

Amphora divisio

A sealed glass vessel containing approximately 2,000 recycled hyphens harvested from deprecated compound words. Contents may have settled during existential crisis.

$28.00Item #jar-001

Note: Hyphens have dissolved into ligatures

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Dash Globe

Sphaera ninguida

A traditional snow globe, but instead of snow, tiny black dashes of varying widths fall upon a miniature rendering of this very gift shop. Shake gently. The dashes never fully settle.

$42.00Item #snow-001

Note: Dashes have formed a union; refusing to fall

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The Museum of Dashes Gift Shop is a subsidiary of the Department of Typographic Ephemera.

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